What to do when you don't fit in with the world around you.

Bueno you gracious and talented true-believer...

It was Henri Nouwen who said the greatest battle in life is self-rejection. Which, is pretty much the truth when you stop and think about it. Because, when you accept yourself nothing else really matters.

I guess that's why the world works so damn hard at getting you to play the comparison game.

Which is a trap by-the-way. Because you're never going to be the smartest or the best (you fill in the blank) no matter how hard you try. 

And, chances are if you've got your wits about you and a bit of self-belief you're not going to fit into the world around you.

For starters, you're not playing the same game as everyone else.

You're also less likely to be fooled by other people's shenanigans. You won't get sucked in by the mindless herd. 

And, this creates a couple of challenges for you. If you're not careful people will think you think you're too good to play the game. Which isn't true. The best way to handle this is to be kind and polite in saying - no thanks - to anyone and anything which insults your soul.

Also, people don't like what they can't control or label. And, if you don't fit in a neat little box they have prepared for you, they won't know what to do with you.

You do need them to like you. You need them to trust you. So, be consistent. Faithful. And, keep your promises. Let the haters hate. 

But, don't sell out. 

It's okay to swim upstream and all those other cute cliche's. Just don't fight it for fighting sake. Be true to yourself. To who you are at your core. To what you believe. Especially about yourself.

But, be prepared. The loneliness birds will try to roost from time to time. Know this is normal life happening. Instead of getting down or beating yourself up, be grateful for who you are and what you have. Gratitude is the antidote to apathy and gets you unstuck when you're feeling lonely. 

So be grateful for the small blessings you have in your life, like...

Real friendship(s).
Learning about yourself.
This email and the device you're reading it on.
The fact you're alive today.
Time to simply be.

The next time you don't feel like you fit in, see it for what it really is: freedom to explore.

When you accept yourself, you'll be a beacon of peace for those who have eyes to really see. 

You'll also attract other people who are a bit off.

I like what Bill Murray had to say on the subject...

"The more relaxed you are, the better you are at everything: the better you are with your loved ones, the better you are with your enemies, the better you are at your job, the better you are with yourself."

Be open, today. And, see what happens. 

Here's to choosing yourself...

Steve Knox


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